Isle Esme
by hiddenzeus
Summary: Edward and Bella experience a night of fear, nervousness, embarrassment and, above all, love when they decide to take their relationship to new heights.


A/N: All Twilight fans have been waiting for the consummation of our favourite couple's relationship, however, the book's scenes left much to be desired. Here is my rendition of what I think conspired between the lovebirds. I tried to keep them as much in character as I could, but I did weaken Edward's vampire eyesight. Assume Edward could see only as much in the dark as humans.

* * *

_"I promised we would try," he whispered, suddenly tense. _

_"If… if I do something wrong, if I hurt you, you must tell me at once." _

_I nodded solemnly, keeping my eyes on his. I took another step through the waves and leaned my head against his chest. _

_"Don't be afraid," I murmured. "We belong together." _

_I was abruptly overwhelmed by the truth of my own words. This moment was so perfect, so right, there was no way to doubt it. _

_His arms wrapped around me. Holding me against him, summer and winter. It felt like every nerve ending in my body was a live wire. _

_"Forever," he agreed, and then pulled us gently into deeper water_ (Meyer, 2008, p. 105).

The water rose to my collarbone, moulding to my body, free from the protection my clothing would usually provide. I have never shown myself to Edward, never forced that level of trust between us. Tonight, all of our walls will be down.

Edward brought his hand up to my face, and let the back of his hand trace the contour of my cheekbones. I took his hand and brought it toward my heart. I knew he could hear it beat strongly, but I wanted him to feel my love without the barriers of my clothing. His breathing increased, matching the pace of my heart, and slowly, he shut his eyes and lowered his face into the water. His hand left my body for a second before being replaced with his cheek.

I stroked my fingers through his hair and laid my head upon his, inhaling his scent. My body was aware of our proximity and brought the familiar sensations that surfaced whenever we were close.

The water rippled with the movement of his head, and once again the skin touching my chest was replaced, this time with lips. It was a tentative touch, lasting a second. He showed his face and gave me a shy smile.

"Was that okay?" he whispered.

I could feel Edward's anxiousness penetrate the air. He was scared that he would hurt me, that he would lose himself to his senses. My trust in him did not birth his own, so I would take this slow for him. I would give him enough time for him to realize that he could love me physically without hurting me.

I smiled and whispered back, "That was perfect."

I reciprocated his actions and put my lips to his chest, over his heart. I felt his breathing falter and raised my head to his eyes. His eyes were dark, but I could not figure out the reason for them to be. He couldn't be hungry? Maybe… maybe it was a different type of hunger.

I breathed out and remembered the times we were alone in bed. Each memory was associated with onyx-coloured eyes.

I took another deep breath and put distance between our bodies. The troubled look creasing his skin was erased with the raise of my hand. I held my body still and watched his face. His eyes never left mine, and I let out an impatient sigh. "Look at me," I commanded. My voice broke at the end as I tried in vain to keep my nervousness at bay.

"I am," he said, amusement filling his voice. However, his voice still faltered, evidence to his nervousness.

"All of me." I couldn't stop the rush of heat to my face. Still, he never moved his eyes.

"Bella… I want to. But, I wouldn't be able to take this night at the appropriate pace. My body–every one of my cells–they yearn to touch you, to… make love. I have yet to get accustomed to the knowledge of your exposure. I don't want to give in to my body's unrestrained urges. I have to take this slowly." He was angry with his limitations.

I stepped forward and put my lips to his. He pulled back quicker than I would have hoped, and buried his face into my hair. He took deep, deliberate breaths. After a few seconds, he let out a small groan. I pulled back to look at his pained expression.

"I… I've never been this aroused," he answered my unspoken question, embarrassed. "These emotions have been hidden ever since I could remember. After I had gotten control over my thirst for you, I felt strange sensations erupt in me. They were new and scary and, above all, exciting. Each time I held your hand, hugged you, kissed you… my body buzzed. I realized quickly that my attraction for you penetrated deeper than just my mind. My body has always yearned for yours. The idea of you and me, together so intimately, was enchanting. That's what makes this so hard. Being together in the water, stripped of our clothes… I can't think straight." He closed his eyes and his troubled expression deepened.

My body fluttered at his words. I never knew how strongly Edward was affected by our physical relationship. It always seemed so easy for him to pull away from me whenever we allowed ourselves too much closeness. Despite the response my body had to his words, I worried for him. I wanted him to be free of trouble, to be relaxed.

"We'll take this slow," I promised. I grabbed his hand and he allowed me to pull him to shallow waters. The warm air breezed past our bodies and we both shivered, aware of our nakedness. I looked up to see his eyes still shut. I fought the temptation to lower my eyes and returned my gaze to my desired destination. We wordlessly slipped past the shore and into our cottage. I let go of his hand and made my way to the lamp, twisting the notch. Darkness filled the room.

I made my way back to the frozen figure by the windowed wall, stumbling upon invisible obstacles. I stood in front of him and waited for him to make the next move.

It felt like days before his hand reached up and caressed my cheek. I jumped at the contact; my body had never been this sensitive to his touch before. He reached down and pecked my lips before pulling us onto the bed. We sat beside each other, the moon illuminating our faces.

"I think it would be better for you to touch me first. I have to get used to your skin on mine before I could trust myself to return the favour," he said. I blushed at the unspoken promises hidden in his words.

Despite my embarrassment, I heeded his advice and allowed my hand to touch his face. Instinctively, his cheek moved into my palm. I stroked his smooth skin and allowed myself to feel the hardness of his neck. I lingered there, marvelling at his Adam's apple bouncing up and down with each of his sharp swallows. Again, I lowered my palms, covering the muscles on his chest. I felt a part of his skin pebble under my touch and desire shot down my body.

"Do that again," he whispered breathlessly. I rubbed my hand against his skin and heard a little grumble come from deep within his throat. He slowly lowered his body onto the mattress. He grabbed my other hand and placed it on the other side of his body.

Encouraged by his reaction, I let my hands slide along the smooth skin of his torso, down to his belly. I felt a trail of hair and followed it down, slowly. His breathing became sharper with every inch I covered. The line of hair broadened and I stopped my journey. My breathing was rough as I recalled the anatomy of a man. I've had countless dreams of this very moment, of loving Edward–all of him. I've always wanted to please him in every way possible.

I did not realize how much time had passed until Edward covered one of my hands with both of his.

"You don't have to if you don't want to," he said.

"No, I want to," I assured, quickly.

He nodded in the dim light and breathed out a large puff of air. His grip on me tightened and he slowly brought my hand closer until–

"Oh," he exhaled, loudly. My heart skipped a beat at his reaction along with the revelation of what was occurring. Ever since we've become physically close, I've had trouble trying to stray away from certain thoughts. I've wondered what he would feel like. I never thought such a sensitive organ could feel so strong in my hands. I yearned to feel more of this part of him–a part that was reserved only for me.

He kept my hand still until his breathing slowed. My breathing only continued faster. He loosened his grip on me and reached over to caress my burning cheek.

"That was a lot to take in," he breathed, "you can continue now."

I looked down at the silhouetted shadow in my hand. I considered briefly turning the lamp back on, for my desire to see him was rising. However, I knew how much self-control Edward was exerting–I didn't want to make this any harder for him.

My hand was still frozen in place as I thought of how to please Edward. I've seen immature kids at school mimicking a certain pumping motion, but I was afraid to disappoint Edward. I didn't want to do anything wrong.

Edward, sensing my turmoil, returned his hand to mine.

"Like this," he instructed through his teeth. He waited a beat before he moved my hand up, then back down. Again, a strangled noise came from the back of his throat.

He let go of me and ran his fingers through his hair. I tentatively continued moving my hands up and then back down.

"How does that feel?" I asked, anxious that I was underperforming.

"Like nothing I've ever felt before," he said after a soft groan. His answer piqued my curiosity.

"You never…?" I trailed off suggestively.

"Curious now, aren't we?" he teased huskily. He grabbed my hand again, stopping my movements, before answering. "The feelings you provoke in me are powerful, always demanding my attention. I remember before I had… tried, I couldn't concentrate on anything except thoughts of you. I realized quickly there was nothing I could do but relieve myself. It felt good, but what I feel now is tenfold of what I can give myself."

Without permission, my mind conjured images of Edward, alone in his room, touch–

"Do you…?" he asked in the same suggestive manner, interrupting my thoughts.

"Yes," I answered confidently, ignoring the bubble of embarrassment forming in my stomach, "I think of you when I do."

Edward groaned and pulled me down to his chest. He brought my face up to his and showed his need for me through a wet kiss. I reluctantly let my hold on him loosen to weave my finger through his soft hair.

Edward reciprocated my earlier actions, trailing his hand from my cheek to my neck and stopping on top of my chest. He squeezed me gently before replacing his hands with his mouth, as he did earlier. However, this time, the innocent tenderness was replaced with primal desire. I closed my eyes and allowed my body to be explored.

He gently pushed me to lay on the plush comforters. He trailed up my body and returned his lips to mine before he asked, "Spread your legs for me?"

Butterflies fluttered through my chest at his request. I opened my legs in front of him, waiting for his next move.

He seemed to ponder on it for a minute before he brought his hand to touch me. Sparks flew from where he lay his thumb. He let his thumb move, and with each stroke of his thumb came big breaths from both me and him. It seemed as if his touches affected him as they did me.

"Does that feel good?" he questioned. He brought his other hand to caress my forehead,

"Better than good," I told him. Involuntarily, I let out a little moan. "Can you…?" I hesitated, scared to ask.

"What's wrong?" He removed his hand.

I tried again. "Can you try doing this?" I couldn't speak the words. Instead, I grabbed his hand and put his fingers against me, moving them in a circular motion. He continued the motion without my help.

"Does that feel better?" he inquired, a curious edge to his voice. I could only nod.

I closed my eyes and allowed Edward to pleasure me. I understood what he meant about the tenfold amount of pleasure. I could never do what Edward's fingers were capable of doing.

All too soon, his movements stopped and I whimpered in protest. The bed under me shifted and my body was met with Edward's. Face to face; chest to chest; hips to hips. The friction forced a gasp out of us.

"Are you ready?" I asked him. He let his cheek roll beside mine before he gave a small nod. Despite his affirmations, it took him a minute to continue. His body shook as he distanced himself from me. He positioned himself and took a deep breath.

"Promise me if I hurt you," he pleaded.

I tenderly ran my fingers through his hair and nodded, too overwhelmed by our proximity to conjure words.

Gently, he broke the last barrier between us, claiming me as his and him as mine. He took me painfully slow as he shook from the exertion. My hands pushed his hips closer to me. The strangled noise returned. Suddenly, his resolve slipped and my body jostled from the force he exerted.

He cried out in pleasure before he calmed himself. "Bella? Bella, love, are you okay?" he frantically asked. Aside from the surprise, my body had welcomed his enthusiasm.

"I'm not hurt," I assured him, "I want you to do that again."

Edward hesitated before he brought his hips up and down with the same force. I let my moan of approval slip into his ears, earning me one in return.

We continued together until a welcome sensation started to build in me. Edward's grunts and groans suggested he was sharing the experience. His grip tightened on me and his head buried into a pillow. He moved his hips harder, gripped me tighter, and groaned louder as he let himself go, his pulsations encouraging my body to do the same.

We lay together, connected in every way.

Wordlessly, Edward moved away from me. The emptiness brought with his departure was filled with his words.

"I love you," he spoke with conviction. He gathered me into his arms and laid his lips upon mine.

I smiled. "I love you, too."

* * *

Meyer, S. (2008). _Breaking Dawn_. United States: Little, Brown and Company.


End file.
